on the train

i got butterflies in my stomach when i saw the train pulling up to the beacon station… the fact that im leaving sinking in was unnerving. boarding the train i found my seat across two hotties, gave them the brian casuals "dangerous but sweet guy grin… and i got smiles back… i still got it!
money is starting to make me uneasy. i know i don't have enough, is it ever enough, but i planed this in haste. thats part of the adventure… i packed some food for the bus ride since its gonna be a 2 day ride… hard boiled eggs, pbnj, sone cookies, and the protein mix with the shaker my father gave me. i figured that would get me buy for a few days.. the body needs protein right?
i wonder what texas is gonna be like. the first thing im gonna do when i get there is get to an aa meeting and speak up.. get plugged in, get some numbers and join a home group. its a way to be social, meet people and take care of my sobriety… i understand that some people are worried about me. my aunt liz read on my face book that i was gonna have a get together at the where house on tuesday the 11th…. she called my father and ratted on me about it…telling him that i was having a huge party. i told her it was taco tuesday there and they serve tacos and she says "so thats what there callin it today huh?". i cant get upset about here response cuz of my past. but i kinda want to unfired her on face book cuz wtf? Facebook is a place where i don't wanna worry about what i say. i wanna be able to have that outlet. im shire she's gonna read this blog and aunt liz i love you so much.. thank you for taking such good care of me.
i was thinking about plain my guitar to make some extra cash before the bus leaves but well see…
no matter where i go or end up in life my family will be with me. im my heart, thoughts, mannerisms, movements… cant escape them not that i would want to. i come from a great home and my family, aunts uncles cousins nephews, is all i got in this world… grandpa said it best. "this is what counts… all the rest is bull shit".
i will sussed out there.